


take a shot (if you won't answer me)

by guiltylights



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Franky is an engineer, Frobin in particular gives me LIFE, Law is a doctor, Lawlu is pure, M/M, My Most Self-Indulgent Fic Ever, Robin is a professor, SO, Sanji is a cook, Zoro is a kendo instructor, Zosan is funny, and i only ever write for self-indulgency, basically you either answer a question honestly or you take a shot, gratuitous mentions of whiskey probably, it's a game called "Truth or Drink", just my personal ideas of what they'd work as in our world, minimal edits we die like men, my first slash fic in One Piece!, they're part of a video, who the fuck knows what Luffy does, yes some of these questions go as disastrously as you think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-10
Updated: 2019-07-10
Packaged: 2020-06-25 14:57:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19748059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/guiltylights/pseuds/guiltylights
Summary: The camera shot opens with a rustle of clothes, caught by the microphones clipped to their collars, as two people settle down opposite each other into the seats pulled out for them in the middle of the set. There’s a table in between, small but just wide enough for a pile of what looks like index cards and two bottles of hard liquor, lined up in a row with the labels facing the camera and the glass glinting under lights. There’s even two shot glasses neatly placed in front of them, along with two large glasses of what seems like juice to act as chasers.Jaunty music starts playing. Someone’s voice-over. ‘So, do you know what you’re here today for?’Zoro blinks at the camera, unimpressed. ‘To drink, I hope.’Sanji snorts. ‘The whole point is to have to avoid drinking, dumbass.’Three couples play "Truth or Drink". It goes as badly, or as well, as you would expect.





	take a shot (if you won't answer me)

**Author's Note:**

> [Time started: 8th July 19, 12:02pm;– ]
> 
> This is the most self-indulgent thing I have ever written and I’m not apologising for it. I hope this is funny, I tried, but well. I’m not a very funny person I think.

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The camera shot opens with a rustle of clothes, caught by the microphones clipped to their collars, as two people settle down opposite each other into the seats pulled out for them in the middle of the set. There’s a table in between, small but just wide enough for a pile of what looks like index cards and two bottles of hard liquor, lined up in a row with the labels facing the camera and the glass glinting under lights. There’s even two shot glasses neatly placed in front of them, along with two large glasses of what seems like juice to act as chasers.

Jaunty music starts playing. Someone’s voice-over. ‘So, do you know what you’re here today for?’

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Zoro blinks at the camera, unimpressed. ‘To drink, I hope.’

Sanji snorts. ‘The whole point is to have to avoid drinking, dumbass.’

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‘A game!’ Luffy cheers, throwing his hands up in the air and nearly knocking over the bottle of amber whiskey that a set-hand had ignorantly placed within the whirling radius of Luffy’s limbs. Law barely manages to grab the bottle before it smashes into the ground.

‘Oops.’ Luffy grins, unrepentant. ‘Sorry, Torao!’

‘Be careful next time.’ Law glances over the label with a critical eye before setting the bottle down on the table, on his side and safe away from Luffy. He knows this brand. it’s shitty whiskey, but well, shitty whiskey is better than none. 

‘Okay, okay.’ Luffy prods one of the bottles. ‘Why do we even have these in the first place? Are they part of the game?’

 _Jesus Christ._ Law looks at the camera. ‘You’d better go through the rules of the game with him again, just to be safe,’ he says wryly. ‘Actually, do you have a printout?’

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‘We’re playing a game called “Truth and Drink” as a couple, right?’ Robin sits back in her seat and folds her hands elegantly into her lap.

‘Yup!’ The voice behind the camera responds. ‘So how it works is that there’s a stack of cards in front of you, and there’s questions printed on them. You’ll each take a turn to pick a card and ask the question to the other person, and the other person has to either answer honestly or take a shot.’

Opposite Robin, Franky is picking at the index cards—the white cardboard looking impossibly small in his large hands—and squinting at them dubiously. ‘If we don’t want to answer any, we take a shot?’ He asks. ‘Yo, that doesn’t sound like any kind of punishment to me. If anything I might start not-answering questions just to drink.’

‘Franky, that’s not the point of the game.’

‘Irrelevant!’

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Another voice-over. ‘So, are you two a couple?’

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Robin smiles fondly. ‘Indeed. Married for about five years now, actually.’

Franky points a triumphant finger at the camera. ‘ _Yeah!_ That’s right everybody, this gorgeous talented amazing super woman is _my_ wife—so back off! _’_

‘Nobody’s approaching in the first place, Franky.’

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Luffy beams wide and blinding as the sun. ‘Yeah! We’ve been dating for about six months now?’

‘Six months and two weeks,’ Law corrects absently.

‘You’ve been keeping track?’

Law flushes and pulls his hat down over his eyes. ‘I—You little—I haven’t—shut up, I’m just good with numbers, unlike you.’

Luffy laughs.

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The look on Sanji’s face right now could only be accurately described as _long-suffering._ ‘Unfortunately.’

‘You’re not exactly a walk in the park to be around either, cook,’ Zoro grumbles.

‘As if you could fucking walk around a park on your own, you directionless moron,’ Sanji shoots back, ‘so don’t even get started on that.’

_‘Do you want to fight?’_

‘ _Bring it on, I could take down your kendo in my sleep—’_ There’s a clatter of chairs.

‘No fighting on set!’ The voice yells. ‘Read the first question!’

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Luffy swipes up the first card, clutching and peering into it with eager eyes and hands. 

‘What’s the worst thing you’ve ever said about me?’

Luffy plonks the card down on the table and looks expectantly at Law, who tilts his head in thought. 

‘I think when we first met, I went back to my friends and bitched about you and your insensibilities for a good hour and a half.’

 _‘Hey!’_ Luffy looks indignant. ‘I wasn’t so bad!’

‘You crashed into me and sent me flying into the park fountain, Luffy. All my medical notes were _ruined._ And when you tried to help me up again you actually did more harm than good and dropped me straight back into the fountain again.’

Luffy stuck his tongue out. ‘Okay, well, you’re sitting here as my boyfriend so who’s laughing now?’

‘Me, actually.’

Luffy grins at that. Law rolls his eyes but doesn’t hide the smirk that crosses his face.

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‘Worst thing I’ve ever said about you?’ Robin frowns delicately. ‘None come to mind… Oh, but when we first started dating and you showed me your workshop, I did accidentally insult one of your inventions.’

‘Oh yeah, that’s right, that did happen didn’t it?’ Franky scratches his head. ‘Which invention was it again? The rotating potato peeler?’

‘The apple slicer one, actually.’

‘Didn’t you accidentally assume it was junk and threw it out?’

‘I _did_ say I was sorry.’

‘Not for calling it useless afterwards, you didn’t.’

Robin shrugs. ‘It takes twice as long to slice an apple with it as it does with a regular knife, Franky. It defeats its own purpose.’

‘Hey! You gotta admit, the idea itself was pretty cool!’

‘I’ll reconsider if you ever make it actually efficient.’

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. 

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Sanji throws his head back and laughs. _‘Hah!’_

‘Do you want the damn list in alphabetical or chronological order?’ Zoro asks the camera wryly, lounging back in his seat with a bottle of clear liquor already clutched in his hand. He’s forgone the shot glasses entirely, opting to chug straight from the source. Silently, behind the camera, the director signals for one of their interns to run out and buy another bottle. They still have other damn shoots to do.

‘Nah, I’ve got the perfect one. Like literally last week you fucking forgot to take out the trash again even though I reminded you a _million times_ to because our apartment often gets _pests_ _—’_

‘Oh my god, are you ever gonna let that go—’

‘And when I finally went to do it my-goddamn-self a whole-ass _swarm_ of cockroaches leapt out of that hell-bin because _you_ hadn’t taken it out in time—’

‘I _said_ I was sorry—’

‘And if I remember clearly, in that moment I called you a—’

What follows next is a series of long bleeps that persist for a solid ten seconds or so, which is truly a feat considering that Sanji has yet to be censored despite the slew of expletives that pepper his everyday speech. When he’s done and looking at Zoro triumphantly, there’s no sound except for a disbelieving _oh my god_ behind the camera.

‘We are going to have to censor literally _all_ of that,’ the director mutters. Was it even allowed to come up with swears like that?

Zoro doesn’t even blink. ‘I took the trash out afterwards,’ he points out. ‘ _And_ exterminated all the bugs.’

‘You don’t get brownie points for cleaning up after your own mess, shithead.’ Sanji leans forward, plucking the next index card off the table. ‘Next question.’

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‘If you could sleep with any person in the world, who would it be?’ Robin reads out.

‘You mean, apart from you?’ Franky looks truly stumped at the question, as if he has never considered anything else, and Robin smiles, pleased.

‘Yes, apart from me. I promise I won’t get mad, so go ahead and answer honestly.’

Franky hums for a moment, mulling it over.

‘For real though, I can’t think of anyone else,’ he admits, and the look Robin shoots the camera is nothing short of triumphant.

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Luffy scrunches his face up. ‘No one. That’s a dumb question. Why would I want to sleep with anyone if I don’t know who they are?’

Law doesn’t look up from where he’s pouring himself a shot. ‘Some people are different, Luffy.’

‘Well, I guess that’s true.’ Luffy decides. He looks at Law. ‘Hey! You’re not supposed to drink that!’

‘I’m not?’ Law picks up the bottle and gives it a judicious glance. ‘Are you certain, because this definitely looks like alcohol to me, and therefore should be _very_ drinkable.’

‘I meant as part of the _game,_ dummy. I didn’t ask you a question!’

‘When have _either_ of us ever followed the rules?’ Law points out. 

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Zoro pauses from where he was bringing the bottle to his mouth. Sanji is slanting him a look, one that says _do your worst, but also I might kill you afterwards, so be very careful here._ Zoro isn’t the most astute, but he suspects on a primal level that he might be in precarious waters here. Like an animal. He has the sense for these things.

But also, Zoro has never shied away from a fight, so after a moment he chugs one gulp of alcohol and says immediately, ‘Eustass Kidd.’

Sanji furrows his brow. ‘Eustass Kidd from that metal rock band? I didn’t even know you listened to metal rock music.’

Zoro shrugs. ‘Good music for when I’m at the gym. Also he’s nothing like you, which is probably the appeal.’ His grin is positively shark-like.

Sanji narrows his eyes. ‘I’ll make you sleep on the fucking couch tonight, don’t think I won’t.’ He reaches out and promptly pinches the skin on the back of Zoro’s hand, making him yelp.

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Law’s airtight logic works with Luffy—when _has_ he followed the rules, ever? So Luffy reads the next question only after downing a shot. The director is despairing. They don’t have the budget to keep letting all these couples drink their alcohol as they please, fucking damnit.

‘Who’s smarter, me or you?’ Luffy reads. Luffy grins, and throws down the card. ‘I can answer that! Torao is! He’s a doctor and everything, so he’s definitely the smarter one.’ 

At the mention of his job Law throws back another shot.

‘Plus, he’s always the ones planning our trips and the places we go, things like that,’ Luffy adds. ‘So, Torao!’

‘Not as if we follow those plans anyway, with your tendency to run after anything that catches your attention,’ Law mutters. He squints. ‘Did you even go to university?’

‘Nah. I don’t like reading, so why would I?’

‘Fair enough.’

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Franky rubs his chin after reading out the question. ‘Ooh, that’s a tough one. Well, you’re the professor with the PhD.’

Robin nods. ‘But your knowledge of mechanics and engineering is something that I could never replicate.’ Robin turns to the camera. ‘The speed at which he can understand, memorise, and execute blueprints is really quite uncanny. There’s no one else as fast as him.’

Franky grins proudly. ‘Aw, shucks, wifey, you’re making me blush.’

‘So I guess my answer would be both of us,’ Robin concludes. ‘We’re equally smart, just at different things.’

‘I agree! Also,’ Franky eyes something off-camera, ‘you might want to fix that tripod of yours—I give it a week max before it collapses and damages that expensive-looking audio recording equipment you’ve got balanced on it.’

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Sanji says, ‘it’s me,’ the exact moment Zoro says, ‘it’s probably me.’

‘What, _you?’_ Sanji says, disbelieving. ‘You literally got lost on your way to the grocery store down our street like last month.’

Zoro scowls. ‘Navigation has nothing to do with how smart you are, curlybrows.’

‘Uh-huh, then what about when I told you to come back with paprika spices and you came back with turmeric?’

‘They look the same!’

‘They absolutely do not!’ Sanji throws up his hands. ‘Also, can you _read?_ The labels are _right there_ on the bottles!’

‘Fine, then what about the time that con artist stopped you on the street and she scammed you out of two hundred dollars?’

‘I knew she was a con artist!’

‘That makes it worse! You knew and you _gave her your money anyway.’_

Sanji looks grave. ‘The women in the world deserve all the riches they want.’

‘Uh-huh, right, keep telling yourself that’s the reason.’

‘I swear to _god—’_

A voice from behind the camera interrupts. ‘So the both of you are just equally idiots?’

As one, Sanji and Zoro turn to snarl at the camera. _‘What?’_

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‘Have you ever thought of cheating on—’

‘No,’ Luffy says, immediately. He looks almost offended at the suggestion. ‘The one I like is you, and cheating would make you sad, so I would never.’

Law doesn’t blush, but the look on his face definitely indicates he’s embarrassed. ‘Yeah, well.’ He clears his throat. ‘Hm.’

Luffy laughs, and leans over the table on his elbows. ‘What about you? Have you ever thought about cheating on me?’

‘Never,’ Law says.

‘Good!’

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‘No,’ Franky says.

‘Absolutely not,’ Robin says.

Together, ‘next question.’

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Zoro bristles. ‘What kind of a fucking question is that? No. I’m loyal. Also, I’m not an asshole.’

Sanji snorts. ‘Jury’s still out on that last one, don’t be too sure.’

Zoro throws a withering look in Sanji’s direction, but Sanji merely rolls his eyes back and reaches over to pour himself a shot.

‘What about you?’ Zoro challenges. ‘Ever thought of cheating on me?’

Sanji picks up his shot glass and inspects it, brimming over with amber-coloured liquid. He sighs dramatically.

‘Who even knows. There’s so many gorgeous women out there, all of whom deserve showerings of my love and adoration, and yet here I am, stuck with a muscle-headed brute who probably doesn’t even understand romance or love—’

‘Oi.’

‘However, no.’ Sanji brings the shot glass to his lips.

‘I’ve never thought about cheating, not even once.’

Sanji throws back the shot. He’s looking anywhere but at the man opposite him as he thuds the shot glass down on the table, and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. Zoro’s gaze is as sharp as a hawk. But then, as the taste of the alcohol actually hits Sanji, his face screws up.

‘Jesus Christ, where did you get this whiskey?’ He turns to the camera. ‘It tastes like drain water. Holy fuck, this is the worst whiskey I’ve ever tasted—’

‘We’re on a budget!’ The director yells, offended.

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‘Who wants sex more?’

Luffy looks up from the question. ‘Probably Torao!’ He answers for the both of them, oblivious to the way Law is slowly sinking into his chair. ‘I don’t really care too much about this kind of stuff—’

‘Oh my god.’ 

‘But Torao likes it, so if he’s in the mood I’m cool with it! Though sometimes I’m doing other stuff, like eating, so—’

‘I am never going to hear the end of this from my friends.’ 

‘But in the end it all works out! We talked about it and stuff so everything’s okay.’ Luffy looks over. ‘Torao, you’re going to sink into the floor if you keep doing that.’ 

‘This game was a mistake,’ Law groans.

Luffy tilts his head. ‘Huh?’ He asks. ‘You’re weird, Tarao.’ 

A sly voice from beyond the camera pipes up. ‘so how often do you two have sex?’ 

‘Oh!’ Luffy lights up. ‘So basically—’

 _‘Please stop talking,’_ Law yelps.

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Franky chortles as Robin promptly reaches over and grabs a bottle of vodka. ‘Don’t want to answer, do you?’ He teases. 

‘Our private life is absolutely none of the Internet’s business,’ Robin informs the audience. There’s nothing but pleasantry in her expression, but everyone on set shivers at the unspoken menace behind her smile. 

As Robin throws back the shot, Franky muses out loud, ‘well, it’s not as if it’s necessarily anything _embarrassing,_ so actually—’ Franky winks at the camera. ‘If you want, I could tell you all about—’ 

The _thud_ as Robin sets the shot glass down is nothing short of ominous. _‘Franky,’_ she says, sweetly. ‘Take a shot.’ 

Under his wife’s terrifying gaze Franky wilts like a spring bud in the heat.

‘Yes dear,’ he mumbles, obediently reaching out for whiskey.

‘Drink the vodka.’ 

‘But you know I hate vodka!’ 

‘That’s the point.’ Robin taps one languid finger against her glass of juice. ‘Learn from your mistakes.’ 

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‘Oh, _him_ for fucking sure,’ Sanji says accusingly, pointing a finger at the man in question seated opposite him, who merely shrugs and doesn’t deny the accusation. ‘Inconsiderate bastard, all things considered—some of us have _jobs_ you know—’

‘You work too much.’ Zoro says into his bottle. It’s nearly empty by now. The director squints in disbelief. That shit was forty-percent and the asshole doesn’t even seem _drunk._

‘Do you _want_ us to not make rent every month?’

‘We make rent just fine in between my teaching of kendo classes and your shifts down at the restaurant, relax will you? Speaking of which, doesn’t your old man own that restaurant? Why won’t he cut you some slack?’

Sanji blows out air derisively. ‘He’ll cut me some slack when he’s dead.’ Sanji reaches over and plucks out the next question. He raises an eyebrow.

Zoro looks over. ‘What?’

In response, Sanji reads out the question.

‘If I was in a coma, how long would you wait for me?’

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‘For as long as it takes.’ Luffy nods as if he’s come to an important decision. Someone whistles off-camera.

Law looks taken aback. ‘Really?’

‘Yeah!’

‘We’ve only been dating for six months.’

Luffy frowns. ‘But I’ve known you for longer than that.’

‘Oh, so you’ll wait for me as a friend?’

‘What? No.’ Luffy huffs, blowing his bangs away from his face. ‘I’m your boyfriend now, so I’ll wait for you as a boyfriend, obviously!’

‘But I might never wake up again,’ Law stresses.

Luffy’s face becomes determined. ‘I’ll make you wake up again,’ he promises.

‘That’s not how it works.’ The doctor deadpans.

‘It is with me!’ Luffy scowls.

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Franky thumps his chest. ‘Forever, babe, and that’s a promise!’

Robin taps her chin. ‘Hmm, that might take a toll on our finances, though.’

‘Hey, I’m being romantic here, don’t ruin it with pragmatism!’

‘Medical fees are quite expensive,’ Robin muses, ignoring Franky’s affronted _oi-_ s, ‘and I’m not quite sure if our insurance would quite cover _forever._ Maybe a few years, at most.’ Robin looks at Franky. ‘You can stop waiting after a few years once our medical insurance runs out.’

Franky narrows his eyes. ‘I’ll make the money somehow,’ he says, serious all of a sudden, and slides his arm across the table to hold Robin’s hand in his. Robin’s delicate fingers look almost dwarfed by Franky’s, sure and strong. ‘I’ll keep you alive for as long as it takes, until you wake up again. I don’t want to spend my life with anybody else by my side. It’s always you, Robin.’

The look in Robin’s eyes is indescribable. As everybody watches, a smile blooms across her face, soft and sweet, and everybody behind the camera falls a little in love. Franky himself looks like he just got knocked out from the sight.

Robin squeezes Franky’s hands. ‘Thank you,’ is all she says.

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Zoro doesn’t say anything, but he reaches out and takes the shot glass, and pours himself a shot. Sanji’s eyebrows go up.

‘What, you’re not gonna answer that?’

‘That’s the point of the game, isn’t it,’ Zoro drawls. ‘Quit asking questions you know the answer to.’

Sanji flares up. ‘Fine, fucking whatever. Don’t answer, be a dick.’ He snatches up his glass of juice and leans off to the side, sipping it aggressively.

Zoro looks at Sanji for a long, immeasurable moment. Then he throws back the shot, swallowing the alcohol and his words.

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Robin breaks the tender moment by pulling away, and inclining her head at the index cards. Franky lets her go without a fuss. ‘Next question, Franky.’

Franky picks it up, and reads it off. ‘Would you ever consider having an open relationship?’

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Luffy screws his face up. ‘What’s an open relationship?’

‘It’s when you’re seeing someone, but also you’re seeing other people at the same time. It isn’t cheating, because both people are aware it’s happening and they’ve given permission for it.’ Law explains.

Luffy’s face clears up. ‘Oh!’ He looks at Law. ‘Would you want to?’

Law grimaces slightly. ‘No. But that’s just who I am. I don’t like to share. What about you?’

Luffy shrugs carelessly. ‘I’m okay with either! So long as you’re happy with it, I’m happy with it.’

Law leans forward. ‘But ignoring what I want,’ he says. ‘What do _you_ want? Would you prefer an open relationship?’

Luffy blinks at the unusually intense expression on Law’s face.

‘I want Torao. And that’s all that matters, really.’

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‘Hm.’ Robin’s face is thoughtful.

Franky leans back. ‘I would hope not, not because open relationships are bad in any way, but because I wouldn’t be able to handle it.’ Franky turns to the camera. ‘Let this be a lesson, people: open relationships aren’t bad! They’re just different. Talk to your partners, kids.’

‘Franky, you’re not even forty.’

‘My point still stands.’

‘But I agree. I don’t think I would be able to be in an open relationship.’ Robin leans her head on her chin and smiles. ‘My personality isn’t suited for it.’

Franky grins. ‘So we agree. Knew we were married for a reason.’

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‘Yes, actually,’ Sanji says. ‘Except that I know you would not be great with that.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

Sanji snorts at Zoro’s offended expression. ‘Relax, algaehead, I don’t mean anything bad by that. Just saying that I know you’re a strictly monogamous person.’

‘You’re not?’

Sanji lifts one shoulder. ‘I’m fine with it either way. So long as the other person doesn’t neglect me because of it, I’m open to anything. In my opinion, you just gotta fucking talk about it. Otherwise it’s just cheating.’

Zoro stares at Sanji.

‘Would you _prefer_ to be in an open relationship?’ Zoro asks.

Sanji shoots Zoro an _are you stupid_ look.

‘No. Didn’t you hear me? I just said I know you wouldn’t want that. So why would I?’

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Law drinks a shot, before reaching out for the next card. The bottle of whiskey is about halfway gone. Their juices, however, are untouched, save for Luffy who has asked for three refills already. But juice is exponentially cheaper than alcohol, so the director doesn’t complain.

‘What’s the one thing you would change about me?’ Law reads.

Luffy folds his arms. ‘Hm, that’s a hard one,’ he says.

‘Oh, there’s actually things you’d want to change?’

Luffy nods. ‘Yeah! Like I wish you’d let me get more snacks when we go out grocery shopping. Or not yell when I accidentally track mud into the house after a day of being outside—’

‘You do it almost _every single day,_ and it takes so much time to clean it up—’

‘They’re just little things!’ Luffy insists.

‘Only because you’re not the one cleaning it up,’ Law grumbles.

‘But I guess probably what I’d actually change is your inability to fall asleep? You need rest, Torao, but you don’t get it, so that’s what I’ll change! So you can sleep.’

Law looks like he doesn’t know what to do with himself.

‘Oh, well.’ He taps his fingers against the table. ‘Thank you.’ Luffy looks pleased.

‘We’re still not getting extra snacks though.’ Law adds.

Luffy’s smirk could only be described as self-satisfied.

‘We’ll see about that,’ he says.

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.

‘Probably your tendency to tell me ghost stories when we’re somewhere scary at night,’ Franky says.

‘Oh, really? I always thought they added to the ambience.’

‘They do, for sure,’ Franky agrees, ‘but in a way that makes me as scared shitless as an eight-year-old boy. So, hm.’ Franky scratches his head. ‘But then again, you wouldn’t be you without your ghost stories, so I’m not quite sure…’

Robin smiles. ‘I’ll try to tone it down.’

‘I appreciate that.’

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.

‘Damn,’ Sanji groans, throwing down the card, ‘I wish _I’d_ gotten that question. I’ve got a million things to say. Your lack of direction, for one, your annoying habit of leaving your fucking socks around the apartment…’

‘Too bad,’ Zoro says, grinning.

Sanji waves an irritated hand. ‘Go on then, go ahead and just say it.’

Zoro eyes Sanji for a moment.

‘You work too hard.’ He says. ‘I’d make it so you’d work less.’

Sanji squints. ‘You’d change me…so I’d take a break?’

‘Yup.’

Sanji continues looking at Zoro as though waiting for the other shoe to drop. Zoro looks back patiently.

‘That’s it?’

‘That’s it.’

‘…Huh. Now I feel kinda bad for _my_ answer.’

Zoro smirks, reaching for the next card. ‘Good. Next question.’ He reads it. His grin grows smug. 

‘…What?’ Sanji asks warily.

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.

‘This is a cute question!’ Luffy laughs. ‘When did you fall in love with me?’

Law, in the process of taking a sip of his juice, chokes. Luffy blinks huge eyes at him.

‘So? When did you fall in love with me, Torao?’

‘I’m taking a shot,’ Law manages in between his coughs, reaching out for the whiskey.

‘What? _Noo, Torao,’_ Luffy whines, hanging onto the bottle as Law tries unsuccessfully to wrench it from his grasp. ‘Answer the question! I wanna know!’

 _'Too bad,’_ Law hisses, as he jerks at the bottle caught in a silent tug-of-war in the middle of them. But as he looks into Luffy’s puppy-dog eyes, he finds his will weakening. Those behind the camera swear they witness the moment Law’s feeble defences crumbles against his boyfriend’s insurmountable will—his face screws up, and his grip on the bottle loosens. Luffy grins, triumphant.

Law slides back to his seat, and mumbles something unintelligible.

Luffy cocks his head. ‘What was that?’

‘I said, when you came down with me to visit my hometown.’

‘Oh!’ Luffy thinks about it. ‘But wasn’t that, like, a year before we started dating?’

Law says nothing.

Luffy’s eyes widen. ‘That long?’ He asks.

‘Yeah. Well.’

The smile that breaks across Luffy’s face splits his face into two, with how hard he is smiling. ‘Tora _-o_ ,’ he coos.

_‘Shut up.’_

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‘I can’t pinpoint an exact moment, to be honest,’ Robin admits.

‘Yeah, same here, actually.’ Franky turns his head. ‘We just kind of gravitated together naturally, y’know? Happened on its own and everything, there was no epiphany or _aha!_ moment, the way there might be with an engineering problem or somethin’.’

‘In a way, it almost feels as though we were always meant to be together.’ Robin smiles. ‘It was very instinctive.’

‘Aw, babe!’

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.

‘Oh, _fucking_ damnit,’ Sanji groans at the question. ‘I’m not going to fucking answer that. I’ll take a shot.’

Sanji reaches over for a bottle, only to realise that there’s none at all.

‘What the fuck?’

Zoro flicks his gaze to the side, innocent.

Sanji glares. ‘Cough up the fucking booze, asshole, this is cheating!’

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’

‘Don’t be a fucking dick. Where’s the whiskey?’

‘You hate that whiskey.’

‘Irrelevant. Where is it?’

‘I don’t know.’

Sanji turns his head and sweeps his gaze threateningly across the camera crew, all of whom twitch and as one do not look at the whiskey bottle wedged behind Zoro’s back on the seat.

‘Fine. Where’s the vodka?’

Zoro lifts up the empty bottle. ‘I finished it.’

‘Are you fucking serious?’ Sanji asks.

Zoro shrugs lazily.

‘Fucking—fine, whatever. Fine. Third year of college, there, you happy?’

Zoro’s eyebrows shoot up. ‘We broke up in our third year of college.’

‘Yeah, you got something to say about it?’ Sanji grumbles, shaking his hair out over his eyes and looking away. ‘I’m well aware of the checkered history of our relationship, thank you very much. Now are you gonna cough out that fucking whiskey or not? I know you’ve hidden it behind your back, and after admitting _that_ embarrassing shit on film I desperately need a drink, no matter how shitty the alcohol.’

Zoro stares at Sanji for a moment, before reaching behind his back and pulling out the whiskey. Sanji’s grumbles of _fucking finally_ turn to a confused _oi_ when, instead of handing the bottle over, Zoro takes one swig of the whiskey, stands up, reaches across the table and sweeps Sanji into a kiss.

.

.

.

‘Last question.’ Robin says.

‘Ooh, what is it?’ Franky asks. Aside from that one sexual question, neither Franky nor Robin have drunk this entire shoot, leaving the bottles untouched. The director thanks god for sensibilities in this world.

Robin picks up the card with elegant fingers, and reads it. Upon reading the question, she smiles.

‘Do you think we’ll always be together?’

.

.

.

‘Yes!’ Luffy cheers. ‘Or at the very least, for as long as the both of us want to. And I want always, so yes! What about you, Torao?’

Law smirks, and reaches across the table. Luffy goes to him willingly, and their fingers entangle together as easily as breathing.

‘Yes,’ Law says simply, and nothing more.

.

.

.

Franky and Robin look at each other.

‘Yes,’ they say together, smiling like there’s no one else in the world but each other.

.

.

.

‘Damn, you’re right, this whiskey really does suck,’ Zoro grimaces, settling back into his chair after Sanji has slapped him upside the head for his embarrassing public display of affection. Zoro runs a tongue across his teeth.

‘Well, you wouldn’t have had to fucking know that if you didn’t pull that stunt,’ Sanji snaps, before smoothing over his front. He plucks at the last index card, reads it, and falls silent.

‘Well?’ Zoro prompts, when Sanji stays quiet for a few more seconds. ‘What’s the question?’

Sanji licks his lips. ‘…Do you think we’ll always be together?’ He asks.

Zoro laughs, and it’s a low warm sound. Sanji blinks a little bit at it, before shaking himself.

‘Yeah,’ is all Zoro says, and that’s all that really matters.

‘Yeah.’

.

.

.

When the video releases onto the Internet, it garners over three million views, becoming an instant hit. In particular, audiences gush over the electrifying blue-haired engineer and serene black-haired professor, the stoic doctor who looks like he hasn’t slept well in weeks with his grinning cheerful boyfriend, and the hilarious green haired kendo instructor and the blonde cook with the curly eyebrow.

But more than anything, audiences love how these three couples in particular exit the scene: unlike other couples in the video, they all leave the set with hands linked together, as though they couldn’t conceive of any other way of leaving otherwise.

.

.

.

.

.

**Author's Note:**

> I had to suspend my disbelief a little bit for this fic because I genuinely believe that Luffy can’t read. But well this is a modern AU I guess he's got SOME literacy skills. Also I don’t know anything about video and film production so literally everything you see here is my guess or me talking out of my own ass. 
> 
> This idea is 100% Not Original, I actually was inspired by CUT’s “Truth or Drink” series. Here’s [an example video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=auBSJIJ_C_8) if you want to check them out! You should check them out considering I ripped the whole idea off of them. Questions are ripped off of them too. I edited one or two questions, and edited the racy ones out (the video has more sexual questions), but mostly they were derived from them. I also tacked on my own video ending just to round up the video, but aside from that… I just really wanted to depict how the different couples would act in such a game.
> 
> Thanks for reading! Leave kudos if you liked this fic, or leave comments too! Comments make a fic writer’s life :) Would you want another instalment of this? I can do other ships too, leave them in the comments if you have suggestions on which couples. I also have a [tumblr](http://guilty-lights.tumblr.com/), if you want to stop by! 
> 
> [Time ended: 9th July 19, 5:35pm;– ]


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